Quick Write

El Me Levantara (He Will Pick Me Up)

I don’t know where to begin but one thing I am sure about is how difficult it’s going to be to word these feelings out. I’ve slacked off, I’ve betrayed you, but the most messed up part is I haven’t talked to you in years even after knowing I was wrong. I don’t deserve to even say your name, I don’t deserve to even have the chance to say this to you. This could have all been avoided and now this is time we are never getting back. Years after years I had been astonished by the stories, by every single sign you gave to me, to everyone. I never doubted who you were and what we had, I knew it all. So what was stopping me? I am an idiot, I am an idiot with no idea about where to go and let alone how to get there. I have been able to go through the most craziest years of my life yet I couldn’t go through one simple task. I had it in the palm of my hands and I let it slip. I knew it right after I did it and I let all this time go by because of my pride, because of my pride I’ve pulled myself away, I’ve made myself believe that you were being unfair. I can’t believe that you are listening to this right now, if I was you, I’d walk away, never open this door anymore. But I am not you, you are amazing, you are the opposite of what I am and everyone else claims to be. You are beyond everything I even think about you. There’s no one out there like you and even though we walk around with a smile, we always feel the emptiness when the fun runs out. You don’t need me, you don’t need anybody because even if we turned into dust you’ll still be you. You’re filled with possibilities, mysterious possibilities but it’s not in my place to question you, you’ve never let me down so I will trust you until that day. So today, I say I am ready to take that step forward and give everything that is holding me back from you up for you, and take every selfish thought and never let it fill my mind. To give up my life to walk in your steps and do what you intended me to do. But if you know me any better you know I will fall and if I know you any better I know you will pick me up.

Flores Flores

Who are you doing it for?

I begin to wonder about what people’s real intentions are. Does anyone really care for another person? Do you really give everything up for someone when you meet or are you secretly doing it for yourself? I met this woman once, and for the sake of her reputation I will call her bitch. This woman claimed to have done everything for her husband, worked two jobs, gave up smoking as soon as they went steady, she even went as far as giving up some friends. The woman was amazing to her husband. He came home and the house was always clean and dinner was already made. The husband didn’t stay behind, he was a real nice guy, worked really hard and was raising a beautiful daughter, who at the time was about my age. So what was the problem? He was raising a daughter that wasn’t his. So was it for her and for them?

Flores Flores

Heart

What are you pulling away? I know we are not perfect together but it feels so real. I’ve never felt so it real. It’s like the whole universe wants us to be separated in our hearts and just forget about everything else and focus on each other. Why do you do this to me? Why do you make my handshake and my heart race? Why do you tend to make me forget about everything else and live in the moment? Are we soulmates? I don’t even know if I would call you my soulmate everything is just so fucked up. But you are like my soulmate. You do make everything so much better, because of you life makes sense. You make my heart skip beats and give me this electricity every time I touch your body. With you I feel like I’ve been dead all this time and every time I’m close to you and hold you tight, I’m alive again. You are my heart, the life to my body. Please come back.

Flores Flores

True

Though I thought I knew you, you are full of surprises. Every time I look back at you it’s like the first time I see you. You’re amazing, you’re far beyond the usual, that gives me the chills. I’ve never loved this hard, such an unknown feeling I don’t think it’s love. You give me this crazy feeling like I’ve known you before yet I don’t believe in reincarnation. How is this so? Such a beautiful being will only exist one time. I don’t believe in luck, but I’m such a terrible person I know damn well I don’t deserve you. So why did God take his time to create you for me? So what else could be the reason? You look at me with those mysterious eyes, I wonder what you’re thinking. I want to intrude your thoughts, I want to know what makes you laugh I want makes you want to punch the wall, what causes you to be so passionate. But I can’t, and it kills me, when will this end? This is too good to be true. A person like me could never find love like this. This isn’t love, this is beyond love. You have become a whole other definition of something deeper than what I’ve ever experienced. You’re ma combination of love and beauty, the perfect combination for a far from perfect being.

Flores Flores

Timeline

You held me in your arms and rocked me until I fell asleep. Looked me in the eyes and said I was beautiful, you said you couldn’t believe how beautiful I was. You sang songs to me and played your guitar, you gave me kisses and heard me cry when I first fell off my bike. You drove me to school, read bedtime stories and told me about when you were a kid, I share those with everyone. You got upset when my brother and I fought, loved me through my terrible teenage mood swings and hugged me when I graduated from high school, you looked so proud. You were the first one I told about my first day on college and you couldn’t look any happier you’d think it was your story. You watched me grow now I’m watching you. I can’t stop crying, I look at you and I see how life is slowly getting to you. I can’t believe how beautiful you are. I caress your face just like you did to me when I was a baby, I tell you about my goals and you smile back at me and tell me how you can’t wait to see me there. I know I’ve never truly appreciated you, I know that I should have done things differently. We are running out of time and I just want you to stop where you are I want you to just stay with me forever I want time to stand still. Just wait for me please, please wait for me!

 

Flores Flores

Broken Not Heartless

Heartless? Definitely not. My heart was full of soul before you changed. You honestly believed that everything would stay the same after all you lies? You’ve got to be joking, of course I’m heart broken, wouldn’t you be? You walk around not giving a damn about all the time invested meanwhile I sit at home wondering what to do to make you feel… Feel? I did feel. Now I’m numb from all the punches you’ve thrown and all the stabbing you’ve done. I’m numb from all the lies you’ve told and the reality check on me. How are you judge me when you gave up on this a long time ago now you realized that I’m drifting apart and you’ve never been able to find the trust for anyone else. I don’t care how much you’re hurting, I ignored my hurting for you, as soon as I walk out your life you won’t know I exist anymore. You’ve had it both ways for too long. Goodbye, don’t grab me, this is what you should have done before it got this far, now look at you, your fake tears, you don’t care about anyone but yourself, you’ve proven it, you’re heartless.

Flores Flores

A Funny Thing Called Destiny

It’s insane how life goes, one day you have everything figured out and the other everything is falling into pieces right in front of your face. You walk around with a smile on your face then you cry yourself to sleep because everything was a disgusting lie. You pit your hopes and dreams in love then you forget what love even means. One thing that will never change though is you. I look at you and see the same happy spirit I saw the first time I saw you. We laughed, we cried, we lived but most importantly we loved. The se passion for life got us through the deepest darkest places we’ve ever got caught slipping on and we were there guiding each other through that tunnel with only one lighter to share. Oh it was dark, it was embarrassing and it was the lowest, but you never held it against me, you never judged me. Now we wonder whether it was worth it, every single step of the way has gotten difficult at times, could we have done it any different? Our answer is no; even though the hurting almost forced us to give up, we always helped each other up every time we fell, I guess that’s why destiny led us to each other.

Flores Flores

Soul

Don’t look into my eyes, what you’ll find might scare you off. You will fall into a hole so deep you will lose your sanity. My soul? Shattered, I’m not sure I can trust I ever had it. I am in a beautiful place right now, I want it all to myself. I don’t need anyone to suck the life out of this place. I sound selfish, I know, but am I really? All I’m doing is protecting you, saving you from the disappointment. Why are you still here? You’ve honestly got to go. The place is deserted, nowhere to hide. You’ve been here long enough to understand it all started as a dream, a sick fantasy where we both hoped the illusion lasted more than today. It’s all done, all over. Don’t look at me like that, I am not who you think I am. I’ve been pretending, I’ve been lying to you, I’ve build a wall to keep you away because I’m a coward, I’m not as tough as I pretend to be. Please leave, run like hell, you don’t need this. You’re still here, You’re still here and I guess I secretly hoped you stayed, I secretly hoped you would do exactly everything you’ve done, you’re perfect. I don’t deserve you. I touch your face and wipe your tears and I feel the electricity, it rushes through my veins. I turned my back many times and I always felt you eyes in the back of my head, you never left me. you hold me so close to me, so tight. I hear your heartbeat, and I feel your soul within every kiss you plant, every look you give me, every touch I feel, I feel. you’ve given life to this place and I can feel.

Flores Flores

You Will Find It

The moment you stop looking for it, you will find it. You sit around all day at home wondering when your life is going to make a 180. I mean really? Do you really think you have a life outside of this? Is this ever going to get any better? You watch a movie where your hopes are bothered, then you drive back home feeling lonelier than ever. You finally get used to being on your own and even though you still sleep on your own side of your bed pretending he’s still there, years have gone by since you said goodbye. You walk to the store and you feel someone’s eyes on you, you glance at him and wow, he’s beautiful. His eyes are the mysterious color of brown, though a very common color, they hold their own unique story. His gentle smile will light up a whole universe and his touch becomes your weakness. You prayed for this love, you have fallen hard.The moment you stop looking for it you will find it.

 

Flores Flores